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I had a special request to add this particular etiquette from one man to another. What is the proper way for steppers to cut in on someone’s dance? The “Sunshine Haywood” moment that I mentioned some time ago in my post, An Unforgettable Start to the Holidays Steppin’ where I danced with different partners over two songs. I am not often honored with this challenge. It isn’t uncommon to see one woman dancing with different men as they trade off smoothly and stay on beat. It is amazing to sit back, watch and observe the skill of Chicago Style Steppin’ in those moments.

Here is where I need your help gentlemen… please chime in because I do not lead.  What is the appropriate signal to ask another man “May I please cut in on your dance?”  I heard that it should be a slight tap on the lady’s hand.  That has happened to me before.  However, sometimes there are different signals from city to city so I don’t know if a “right” signal exists.

I often see this transition or trade-off in different ways. One, when the woman is put into a turn and either reverses and ends up in a new partner’s arms. Or two, when she is led to execute a rollout from one partner and a rollback to a new partner.  There are so many ways that I have seen this done.  So, what is or what are the cues?

Cues for Cutting in on a Dance

For courtesy’s sake, this reader asked to remind men to ask before cutting in on his dance. At the time he was enjoying the song and dance partner, someone cut in without asking. I want to believe steppers aren’t going to rudely cut into a couple dancing without gesturing somehow. What are the cues or signals to ask? And now that I think of it, who does the “cutter” ask? the man or the woman? How do you tell someone “no” if they give you the signal and you just want to finish this song?

It seems I have more questions than answers on this etiquette. At the end of the day, we all need to be respectful and polite to each other. If there is a tradition to ask to finish out a dance that someone else started, there are some folks that aren’t sure of what it is – including me. Someone who knows, please do tell what is the etiquette for steppers to cut in on a dance on the set.

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