Every contest teaches me something and stretches me to face certain challenges head-on like this lesson for steppers to jump in. I have to admit though I know I don’t conquer every challenge. And, my biggest challenges are often before the contest. In 2019 I went to Chicago more than twice a month in August and September to get ready for the WLSC. The 2019 contest season was heavy for me because my partner, Maurice Thomas, was someone who had won and placed in steppin’ contests several times. He had a legacy and reputation. I had no wins in contests. So, I felt a lot of focus and attention on us.
- “What is she thinking?”
- “What is Maurice thinking?”
- “Well, let’s see what they will do. This partnership could be an upset that leaves an unpredictable win.”
- “There is no way she can keep up with Maurice.”
- What is he going to dress her in?
Contrarily enough, my biggest challenge of the contest season wasn’t related to any of the comments from steppers and friends. On a crowded Saturday at the 50 Yard Line, people from other cities and Chicago were out to step. It was also my first time to see Ice Ray at the 50. As many times as I’d been to Chicago, I’d seen Ice Ray in person only once before at Universal Entertainment Center. I got fair hints and signs of what was about to happen.
The Hints
- At some point, Ice Ray told the DJ to stop the music. Then he walked onto the small stage, directed people and took some by hand to clear the stage. He walked up to me, looked at me, walked right on by and said nothing. Did Ice Ray just grant me permission you stay on the dance floor? 😳 I did not move. Maurice and I stood on the stage ‘alone.’ Were we going to dance? Noooooooo. Hint 1. Right?
- On the side towards the DJ booth, Ice Ray led a young lady to the dance floor and corralled about 6 of the best male steppers in a circle – Shawn Bandy and Nikee were in the line up. I am just a short distance away. Ice Ray tells the DJ what song to play and starts off the young lady. He says to the guys “Dance with her.” I watched them dance. Maurice walked off the stage away from me. Hint 2.
- Both Andre Blackwell and Angela “Sewsistah” Smith came up to me, coaxing me and encouraging me. “Get out there! How are you going to learn if you’re not dancing with the best?” Dre reprimanded. Hint 3. I stood still. Why didn’t I move my feet? I watched and I felt like everyone was watching to see what I would do. Why is it so hot in here all of a sudden?
- Angela jumped in and led for a few counts and jumped out. Then Sherry Gordon came on stage and joined in too with the other guys waiting their turn to dance. Hint 4!!!
The Reaction
What do I do? Of all things, I fell back into the shadows and waited for the dance circle to finish after 3 or 4 songs. Wrong move. Epic fail! I believed several silly reasons not to jump in.
- This moment was about the other young lady, not me.
- I didn’t want to cut into anyone else’s moment.
- I don’t lead.
- After Ice Ray watched me at Universal just a week before losing my balance in turns I was not keen on embarrassing myself twice in front of him.
For a few days, I felt sick to my stomach about my reaction and overthinking. Maaan, I am still mad and kicking myself about it. Then, I told my mentor and the response … “What are you practicing for if you don’t dance? Why are you wasting my time?” I realized that practice was not about getting ready for a contest. It was about moments like these.
The Lesson
Finally, “When you have an opportunity, seize it because it may not come again. You never know what you might learn about the dance and about yourself.” At the end, there should be no regrets. When I encourage stepper friends to just relax when they dance with someone from Chicago, it’s because I have those moments personally – then and now. Steppin’ really teaches you to get through moments where you are silly enough to doubt yourself.
The Etiquette
When a legend in Chicago opens the door for you to get on the floor and show yourself, steppers, you better jump in and dance.
Seize your moment.”
